![]() ![]() In choosing men who are aloof and unlikely to be interested, you avoid having to be hurt in the way you fear. Living in a dream world feels safer than the rejection you fear in the real world. You don’t actually want to be in a relationship and are emotionally unavailable. You hope that one day he’ll catch up to how you feel and return it. In losing all sense of proportion, you become so consumed by how you feel that you want them to be swept up in all the love you have to give. You think that your feelings are big enough for the two of you. And then you wonder why they haven’t reciprocated your feelings. But the majority of this stuff is in your head, so you haven’t communicated with them. You want them to notice you, to see you in the way that you see them. And then you project the feelings you think you have onto them and assume that they should feel and perceive similarly to you. ![]() You choose men that cater to your own negative self-fulfilling prophecy and that are likely to leave you ‘crushing’ on them. There are four key reasons for finding yourself needing to let go of a relationship that doesn’t exist: You are a queen of projection. The issue is about you not wanting to let go of your feelings, your obsession, your drama. The issue here isn’t really about ‘him’ (or her), as they’re not really part of the equation when you’ve created an illusion rather than keeping your feet in the real world. ![]() The only person you have to break up with is you (and your overactive imagination and feelings). In essence, how do you let go of a one-sided attraction - a relationship that doesn’t exist?įor a start, you can’t ‘break up’ when there isn’t a relationship to break up from. There are two big questions that readers have grappled with recently: How do I let go of the guy that didn’t reciprocate my feelings? How do I let go of the guy that I didn’t actually have a relationship with? Tags: assclowns, boundaries - personal electric fence, he's just not that into you, lending money to partners, money, Online Dating : People supermarket ![]()
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